The Lord Will Provide
I’ll be honest, this is all a little uncomfortable to put out like this but, in order for me to give God glory as He deserves, it feels necessary. About this time last year, God began a work in me. Well, really He was continuing a work to grow me from having a worrisome, penny-pincher mindset to fully trusting Him as my Father (with unlimited resources) who would absolutely provide for me. You see, I’ve always been a saver and very careful with money which has been mostly a good thing. Long story short, God, in a funny but most gentle and kind way, showed me that I was living like a rodent. Scavenging, over-thinking purchases, worrying too much about finances, and sometimes stingy if I’m honest (and I had improved some by this point.) I repented and allowed Him to work in me and by the time the New Year rolled around it was noticeable that He was reconstructing my perspective. He was also making it clear that in 2018 He wanted to prove to me how He could be my provider.
Tim and I moved to Nashville and, for a long time, largely lived off our savings along with profits from selling our house. We both knew that was what God was asking us to do when we moved here and we both felt at peace throughout that time. We did receive support from a few friends in that time, which we are so grateful for, as it prolonged the length those resources lasted! That money, however, was dwindling around the time God started to speak to me about my mindset and His ability to provide. Basically, this time last year, we could live maybe another month on our savings and we had one usable vehicle with 300,000 miles on it. We, somehow, instead of freaking out and fretting (as we’ve done before) retained peace and trust in Him. Perhaps God knew He needed to intervene before I had a chance to lose that. He was pressing in – telling me that I should not worry about spending or money and reassuring me that He knows how to provide everything I need and more.
If this were several years back and I had heard this idea (use up our savings and then just trust God to provide), I probably would’ve thought it was pretty foolish and unwise. But a year ago, somehow, we decided to trust God and what He was promising. Though we’ve never all-out trusted God in this way for our provision, He has always been faithful so I guess there was no good reason not to trust.
I can’t tell you how often the scripture in Matthew 6 was brought to mind over the past year when I saw a bird. “26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” It made me smile every time. And, a few verses down it says “33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Along with a few other scriptures, God wanted me to read this aloud each day to be reminded and proclaim His promise.
And here’s what I’ve been leading up to… PRAISE TO OUR GOD! HE HAS BEEN SO FAITHFUL! HE HAS PROVIDED OUR EVERY NEED AND MORE over the past year! Not only our personal needs but also the cost of ministry expenses. My mind is still blown thinking of all His provision in this time. Though there were a handful of days anxiety tried to creep in…we never had a need to worry. He orchestrated a church to collect donations for us. Months when bills rang up more than our bank account, we’d get a check in the mail from someone in plenty of time or He’d provide extra opportunity to make money. Somehow, through Father God’s goodness, there has always been enough. He also led us to get a second vehicle by selling our old, unusable truck and replacing it with a properly working CRV. Then, a friend graciously decided to gift us his awesome car, allowing us to replace our well-used 300,000+ mile car. Wow, only in God’s kingdom economy do these things happen! To God, I am grateful beyond words. He has led us in what work to do and has sustained us just as He promised. All while keeping us in peace and consistent reassurance.
And to YOU, I am so very thankful for you. We are grateful for each of you who have chosen to generously give and participate in this work He has called us to. To you who have consistently given each month and to friends who have mailed just-in-time donations. To you who have given us gifts, bought us things, taken us out to eat, or given us a car! To all who have believed in us, prayed for us, encouraged us, and supported us… we give thanks to God for you and ask Him to bless you in even greater measure! Your kindness and generosity has, many times this year, moved me to tears of thankfulness and awe.
This past year has been such a faith-building and humbling experience. It has been so good to learn to trust the Father more deeply – to trust that He will provide and a joy to see how He does that.